Finding out that you are pregnant can be a wonderful and exciting surprise, even if you have planned for it to happen. However, there will be time when the pregnancy was not planned and will come as a shock or possibly be the worst news you had ever hoped to receive. It is good to know that, although most unwanted pregnancies are a big shock to begin with, most people can overcome these feelings and change the way that they think about the baby. Taking some small, logical steps, will help change an unplanned pregnancy into a good experience, for you, your family and the baby.
As soon as you can, speak to a friend about the situation. You will need to choose someone who is not going to be too judgmental or use your experience as their next gossip topic the moment you leave. Also, try to choose someone who will be supportive. You will most likely be an emotional wreck and will need a friendly shoulder to cry on and a friend who can objectively listen to your fears and worries. You don't want to choose someone to confide in who will judge you so that you are spending your whole time defending your actions that got you where you are,
Once you begin to get over the shock be finding out you are pregnant, you have to be ready to tell others. You will most likely get the whole range of responses, including congratulations and anger. You need to make yourself ready for both types of responses. You cannot change what has happened, you are pregnant and people will have to deal with that fact. Try not to regret what you have done or it will lead to sadness. Look forward to giving birth to a healthy baby and bringing a new life into the world.
Unplanned pregnancies happen to people every day, so you are not alone in your situation. If you would like to talk to someone else about your situation, there are support groups or qualified counsellors who can help you understand how you are feeling and to make the right choices. Talk to them if you feel comfortable speaking to a stranger. Often, talking with someone who is objective, can be very useful. Counselling is not therapy, but it does help you clear your thoughts.
It is important for you to let the father of the baby know - as soon as possible! This will not be easy and it is probably the person who will make the most difference to the way you feel about the pregnancy. Expect emotions of fear, rejection, denial or joy and many more in-between. The best case scenario would be that the father would support you and be with you during your pregnancy. Even if he is not going to be with you and the baby after they are born, it is important that they understand their significance in the entire affair, now, in 9 months time and for the rest of their lives.
Pregnancy can be a strange time for a woman as her body changes. Your body will be flooded with hormones and you may be a little more emotional than usual. Make sure you understand these changes and take them into account when speaking to and dealing with others. This is a time for you to have friends and family, not lose them over hormonal outbursts.
